About Friendship

An intern whom I worked with 2 years ago sent me this email, which I find very touching. I don't like most spam mail, especially those which asked you to forward to more people or you will get bad luck. But this is not those irritating ones, and hope it will touch your life just as it had touched mine.

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"Let's see if you send it back. We all know or knew someone like this!!

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle.

It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. ' They really should get lives. ' He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!' There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.

I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him. Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday! ' He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship..

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. ' Thanks,' he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.'

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize its depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.

You now have two choices, you can : 1) Pass this on to your friends or 2) Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1. 'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'

There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. It's National Friendship Week. Show your friends how much you care. Send this to everyone you consider a FRIEND. If it comes back to you, then you'll know you have a circle of friends. "

This is hilarious!!!

A funny episode which I find interesting to write it down:

Background: CK is my team mate working together with me on my current project. His wife is going to UK for study for a year today. I sent him the following email at 12.03am:

Hey, if you are lonely, can call me for movies ok?? :)
Cheers,
Litao

30 min later, the following conversation on msn (before he had read my email)
CK: my wife just leave
CK: reach home
Litao: haha
CK: without her voice
Litao: don't be sad..
CK: like so loney
Litao: just sent you an email
Litao: follow the instructions ok?
Litao: :D

No reply for ten minutes...


End of story.. I find it funny cos was trying to imagine his reactions when he reads my message on msn before the email. Must be cursing and swearing about how "empathic" I am to his situation; still asking him to do more work even though he has rolled off.

Haha, my twisted sense of humor... lol

How to Quit Smoking

First of all, a piece of good news to share with everyone! I have decided to go to Hanoi instead of touring Taiwan. Basic logic suggests that I should stay in Taipei after my meeting and spend my one week's vacation exploring Taiwan. I have chose to follow my heart instead, visiting a place which still leaves good memories. Partly it is because of meeting my dear roommate Dave, partly it is because he will be providing the accomodation, and mainly because Hanoi is such a beautiful place!

I have been to both cities, and while I enjoyed my Taiwan trip very much, the Hanoi trip is the one that I have fonder memories of (due mainly because of Oscar and Dave :) ). Anyway, this has nothing to do with the topic of this blog. "How to Quit Smoking" is not just about how to quit smoking, but rather, it is a philosophy about how we can move away from our bad habits and adapt the ones which we like.

I was visiting one of the provinces in China, Jiu Zhai Gou, and I got this advice from an uncle who was a fellow tourist. He was sharing with me about why he had decided to kick his smoking habit for his grandson, and how he did it. His method: to NOT shy away from his smoking friends, but instead, continue to hand around them, even though they would always pick up a cigarette after meals or while chatting. I was very surprised to hear it, and thought that he must be bragging about his will power. But when he explained to me his rationale, I realized the profoundness and applicability of his approach.

His rationale: A lot of people quit their smoking habits (or gambling or any other vices) by removing themselves from friends who shared the same habits. For example, a person trying to quit gambling would keep himself away from friends who frequently gamble. While these people do succeed with kicking these habits, it means a change in living habits. Also, he gave this example of people who managed to kick smoking for a few months, but when the person is stressed or when he is with the company of people who smoke, there is a great likelihood that he will have to fight off the temptation of picking up a cigarette.

Hence, instead of changing your living habits, continue with the way you live your life. Each time you feel the urge to pick up a cigarette, fight with yourself internally. Do not give in to the little devil in you.

Do not remove the temptation, for you can't remove all temptations. Instead, continue to expose yourself to these temptation, and fight them away regularly. This way, once you have kicked away the habit, no amount of temptation would cause you to go back to your old ways, since you would have trained yourself in fighting away these temptations.


A friend whom I just knew yesterday told me it's time to move on. (Not sure what's her name is, and maybe I won't know also, but her number is stored as AR in my phone. Very funny story, but that would be for another blog,.) Nothing is going to change, it's going to be life as usual. For there will always be little devils sitting on our shoulders telling us what to do, and if we want to change our life, we have to learn to distinguish between the little angel's voice and the little devil's call.